Dangerous Things

There is an old joke that people use when referring to Australia. They say everything here can kill you. That isn't true, but it is reasonable to admit there are a large number of unlikely things here that could produce a painful, agonising death. But we have nothing on South Africa.

Not only did you have to contend with the snakes, spiders, scorpions, crocodiles and sharks that make Australia so hazardous, but there were the other obvious dangers, such as leopards and lions. But what makes Africa truly formidable are the trees. In the land of large herbivores, every tree has some form of defence. And the most popular one is thorns. Thorns, everywhere. One particularly nasty tree has developed thorns that curve backwards like a cat, and so if you accidentally walk into one, you can't walk out in a hurry. Or in any other direction for that matter. This made crawly through the bush measuring and sampling trees a particularly hazardous experience. Even the grass had razor sharp edges.

Not only the plants, but the insects were out to get us. During our orientation talk, our guides mentioned scorpions, and told us to wear shoes at night. And being newly off the plane, we did. However after a few nights, not seeing or stepping on anything, we became lazy. After two weeks, most were skipping shoes entirely, though some still wore their thongs.

In South Africa, their is a particularly nasty arachnid called a solifuge which is neither spider nor scorpion, but runs around with absolutely huge pincers on its front. They can easily draw blood and are very painful. So you can imagine, no one was very happy when I walked into the conference room and pointed out one running around the floor. No one had shoes, and so everyone was promptly standing on the table. After two failed attempts of getting it out the door, I went to enlist help. As we were returning, we saw the solifuge running out the door towards us. Followed by an enormous scorpion. Followed by another, even bigger, solifuge. It was a very tense few minutes standing in the dark looking for them. Closer examination of the scorpion showed very small pincers and a very large tail. If you are even confronted by a scorpion, hope it has large pincers. A nip may hurt and the sting is excruciating, but you won't need to rush to hospital. As it was, the one we encountered could easily send you to hospital, possibly kill you screaming. It was our last night in the bush, but Africa made it memorable.